First Do No Harm Read online

  “Rowan and I would love that,” Galen said.

  “Rowan’s her girlfriend. Her very serious girlfriend,” Pierce said, immediately feeling foolish the second the words left her mouth.

  Galen raised her full, perfect eyebrows at Pierce. “How about tomorrow night?”

  “Tomorrow night sounds great,” Cassidy said. “What can I bring?”

  “Just yourself. Oh, and my cousin, I suppose.” Galen laughed and rubbed Pierce’s short hair. “See you later.”

  * * *

  What on earth had Cassidy just agreed to? One minute she was ordering a latte, and the next she was scheduling a double date with Pierce and her cousin. Was it even a date? Technically, Pierce hadn’t even asked her—Galen had. In fact, Pierce hadn’t even really said she wanted to. Could you be any stupider, Cass? She walked back into the ER hoping she could avoid running into Pierce for the rest of the day.

  Her shift trucked on, and Cassidy found it hard not to look for Pierce around every corner. She tried to shake off her disappointment when she didn’t see her for several hours.

  “Hey, Cassidy. I need some help in here.” The afternoon had grown chaotic, and everyone seemed tied up with their own complex patients. Cassidy was on her way to find the bathroom for the first time since lunch when Pierce poked her head out from behind the curtain in room fourteen. Fourteen was one of the Fast-Track rooms. This was the area where most of the non-urgent patients were sent—the concussions, the lacerations, the extremity injuries. One of the PAs usually ran it, when they weren’t busy on the other side of the department. Cassidy realized this was where Pierce had been all day and took immediate note of the tumbling that began in her stomach when she saw her.

  “What’s up?” She did her best to keep her words as cool and casual as possible. The less she said, the better.

  “I think this guy’s about to crump in here.” Pierce’s face was just a shade paler than usual, and her eyes were tinted dark with worry.

  “What’s going on?” Cassidy rushed to her, forgetting just how badly she’d needed to pee.

  “He came in as a simple closed head injury—tripped on a stump running outside. No loss of consciousness. Just a little headache. I hadn’t even gotten a chance to see him yet before he started complaining of severe pain. A second ago he was slurring his speech, and now he’s totally out.”

  Cassidy, the nervous teenage girl, went into recess, and Dr. Sullivan, the trained emergency-room physician, appeared, rubbing the patient’s sternum with her knuckles. The man groaned but didn’t move. “Sir, can you hear me? Open your eyes.” When the man didn’t respond, Cassidy pried his eyelids open with her gloved fingers, shining her penlight into both of his pupils.

  “Shit, his left pupil’s blown.” Pierce grabbed the nearby bag valve mask and hooked it up to oxygen, placing it over the man’s mouth. “It wasn’t like that five minutes ago.”

  “Did you CT him?”

  “Of course not. It was just a minor injury.”

  Cassidy realized she sounded like she was scolding. “I know. We need an attending in here.”

  “I tried to call for one. No one’s around.” Pierce glanced nervously at the monitor over the patient’s head, which displayed his steadily climbing blood pressure.

  Cassidy pulled back the curtain again, standing in the door, looking around for anyone with a white coat who knew more than she did. Several nurses bustled around with their computers on wheels. “You. Can you help us in here?”

  “Her name’s Jean,” Pierce whispered. “Hey, Jean, this guy’s in bad shape. I think he’s got a bleed.”

  The short, plump nurse with hair graying at the temples and a soft, pleasant face entered the room calmly. “What do you need?”

  “Can you call down to CT? Let them know we’re coming,” Cassidy said.

  “Wait.” Pierce spoke slowly and confidently in a way that impressed and reassured Cassidy in a crisis. “I think we need to tube him first.”

  Cassidy looked down at the patient again, observing his breathing, which had quickly turned to irregular, gurgling snores. “You’re right. Look at his arms. He’s starting to posture. He’s herniating. Jean, can you set us up for intubation?”

  “Don’t you want an attending first?” Jean asked, clearly having seen her share of cowboy residents in her day.

  “We don’t have time. Grab one hundred of succs and twenty of etomidate, and let’s get ready with two hundred of propofol,” Cassidy said, trying not to let the sheer terror of the moment show.

  “I’ve got suction going. He’s preoxygenating with a non-rebreather. But we need to move, fast,” Pierce added.

  The hands on the clock moved in double time as they waited for Jean to return from the med room with the vials.

  “I’ve got one hundred of succs and twenty of etomidate,” Jean said.

  “Let’s go ahead then.” Cassidy took a deep breath and exhaled slowly.

  “Etomidate is in. Succs is going in now.”

  For nearly a minute, they stood and watched, Pierce at the head of the bed, Cassidy to her left, giving time for the sedatives and paralytics to kick in. Finally, the man’s breathing ceased altogether.

  “You take the tube,” Cassidy said to Pierce. She was never one to give up a procedure, but this was Pierce’s patient. And something about seeing her work in the face of death was unnervingly sexy.

  Pierce unflinchingly picked up the laryngoscope used to open the man’s mouth with one hand and the endotracheal tube with the other. “I’ve got a good view of the cords.”

  “Oxygen sats are ninety-six percent and holding,” Jean said.

  “Tube’s passed. I’m in,” Pierce said confidently.

  Cassidy placed her stethoscope over the man’s chest. “Good lung sounds. Nice job. Let’s get him down to CT. Come on, Pierce. You drive, I’ll bag.”

  * * *

  Pierce sat in the back of the department, tapping her foot and repeatedly clicking the refresh button on the computer.

  “Come on…” she muttered.

  “Be patient. They’ll be up in a minute.” Cassidy stood behind her and put her hand on Pierce’s shoulder for just long enough to make Pierce forget the sickening crater that had opened in her gut. This was what she loved about being in the ER. In a matter of minutes, her very stable patient had become critical, and she had the tiniest window of time to intervene. As she waited for the CT images of the man’s brain to appear on her screen, she thought something must be wrong with her that allowed this sense of excitement to always accompany the horror. Pierce sighed. As much as she’d love to have a nice, cushy nine-to-five schedule, her patients’ biggest problem a runny nose and occasionally a need for their blood-pressure medications to be tweaked, at least for now, she was too much of a sucker for the chaos and unpredictability.

  “There.” Pierce nearly jumped out of her seat. The scans finally loaded, and she pointed eagerly to a crescent-shaped patch of white stretching across the edge of the brain. “Subdural. It’s big, too. Look at that midline shift.”

  “Holy shit,” Cassidy whispered.

  “That your guy in fourteen?” George Turner, one of the ER attending physicians, appeared behind them.

  “Yeah. Damn. Think he’ll make it? That’s a huge bleed,” Pierce said.

  “I don’t know. It’s pretty impressive. But he’s young and healthy. He has a chance if they get him up to surgery right away. Neurosurg knows, right?”

  “They’re already on the way down,” Cassidy answered.

  George put both of his big, paw-like hands on their heads like they were his young children who’d just gotten into some kind of trouble that he secretly found endearing. “Nice work, you two.”

  Pierce liked George. He was one of her favorite attendings so far. “I’ll let you know when neuro gets here.”

  “Good.” George smiled and walked away.

  “That’s it? We’re not going to get chastised for tubing a patient without an attending?
Not even a scolding?” Cassidy asked, gawking.

  “Do you want to be scolded?” As soon as the words left her mouth, Pierce hated herself. What a stupid, accidental come-on. A stupid, hypersexual, gross-sounding accidental come-on.

  Cassidy looked at her for a long time, her expression stoic. Pierce couldn’t even find the words to explain she’d meant nothing by it. Instead, she remained silent, still, feeling like an utter idiot.

  “Is that an offer, Pierce?” Cassidy’s brow twitched for a second, and she smiled with her full, pink lips—first with just the corners of her mouth, and then with her entire face.

  “I…It was…Shit.” Pierce looked at the floor and shook her head, squeezing her eyes shut.

  “Hey. I’m just teasing.” Cassidy touched Pierce’s shoulder again, and heat spread across Pierce’s chest, her heart beating just a little bit faster and her hands tingling just enough to remind her that something was happening between them. It was probably nothing, Pierce told herself. Just a little harmless attraction. But whatever it was certainly wasn’t subtle.

  Chapter Six

  “Ro? I’m home.” Galen opened the door to the apartment, where their Lab, Suzy, was waiting with a wagging tail and a stuffed elephant in her mouth.

  “Hey, Suz. Where’s Mom?”

  Suzy just continued to look at Galen adoringly, finally jumping to her feet and pouncing, no longer able to control herself. As Galen wrestled with Suzy on the kitchen floor, she noticed the shower running.

  “Ro?”

  “I’m in here.” Rowan’s voice came muffled from behind the bathroom door. Galen temporarily abandoned Suzy and opened the door. “Hi,” Rowan said, her head emerging from behind the shower curtain.

  “Well, hello there.” Galen leaned over to kiss her, the water misting onto her own face and hair.

  “How about you get in here and join me?” Rowan grabbed Galen’s shirt collar and pulled her in, kissing her again, this time with more need and conviction.

  “I can’t say no to that.” Galen pulled off her shirt, then her pants, letting them fall to the floor. Finally naked, she pulled back the curtain and stepped in, the hot water caressing her back and neck. She grasped Rowan’s hips, pressing their bodies together until they were so close even the water had a hard time falling between them.

  “You feel so good,” Rowan said, moaning. “I missed you today.”

  “I missed you.”

  “How was the day?” Rowan dribbled some shampoo into her palm and began lathering it through her long hair as Galen continued to gently rub her back. The water made her fingers glide easily down to the curve of Rowan’s ass, and Galen’s focus momentarily blurred.

  “It was fine. But Pierce may have met someone.”

  Rowan’s head, still soapy, bobbed up. “Really?”

  “I mean, I don’t know. I saw her with this new resident today. And they were pretty cozy. Pierce seemed pretty into her. I think it was mutual.”

  Rowan grabbed Galen’s hands and pumped them up and down. “Tell me more! Who is she? What’s she like?”

  “Whoa. I met her for, like, a minute. Her name is Cassidy, I think. She’s a new EM resident who just transferred here for some reason. That’s literally all I know. Why are you all jazzed up about Pierce’s love life anyway?”

  “Because.” Rowan put her palm sweetly on Galen’s cheek. “She’s your cousin. And she reminds me of you when you were that age.”

  “You didn’t know me when I was that age.” Galen smiled and kissed her hand.

  “True. But it’s what I imagine you were like. You know, besides all the hopeless womanizing.”

  “Whatever.” Galen rolled her eyes.

  “I think Pierce used serial monogamy in the same way you used sleeping around. She was trying to fill this void of finding the one.”

  “You sure you aren’t thinking about a career change? Maybe psychiatry?” Galen loved teasing her and how sensitive Rowan was. She also loved that she was so invested in Pierce’s happiness.

  “I’m the best damn senior resident you have, Dr. Burgess. Don’t make me take you into the bedroom and have my way with you.”

  “Oh, no. That would be horrible, Dr. Duncan. Please don’t.” Galen pulled Rowan into her again and kissed her earlobe, then followed with a trail down her neck and shoulder as Rowan giggled uncontrollably.

  “I really hope Pierce finds someone,” Rowan said, putting her arms around Galen’s neck.

  “I hope she finds her Rowan,” Galen said, kissing her softly. After all this time, her insides still tossed and tumbled hopelessly when their lips met. And she knew that would never change.

  “You’re very sweet.”

  “No one’s ever called me ‘sweet’ before.”

  “That’s because you were a dick before me.” Rowan grinned and kissed her forehead.

  “What can I say? You bring out the best in me. But there’s one more thing. I kind of invited Pierce and Cassidy over tomorrow night. I don’t know. It just came out before I could think about it. I’m sorry if it’s too much. I can make something easy, and it’ll be super low-key. I promise!”

  “It looks like I’m wearing off on you. I love that idea. And I love you.”

  * * *

  It was dumb for Cassidy to be so worked up about a non-date date. Pierce hadn’t even invited her. She was probably just being polite. God, Cassidy must have sounded like such an eager little puppy, just jumping at the chance to spend more time with her. Pierce knew she was gay, now. I mean, Cassidy had all but spelled it out for her when they were getting coffee. Hadn’t she? And Pierce hadn’t so much as smiled her way since then, unless they were working on a patient together or crossing paths at work. Maybe she had a girlfriend? Or maybe she just plain wasn’t interested.

  Cassidy’s bed was littered with piles of dresses and skirts and tops. She must have tried on twelve different outfits, and everything looked blah at best. Finally, she settled on an olive-green, wool pencil skirt and a white blouse cut just low enough to show off what slight cleavage she had. She futzed with her hair, tying it up in a tight bun first, but then she decided she looked far too much like a schoolteacher out of a porno and let it down to fall wildly across her shoulders. Finally, she stepped into her favorite pair of Chelsea boots and zipped up the side. Pierce wasn’t tall. Maybe she wouldn’t want Cassidy towering over her like some kind of amazon? You are being fucking ridiculous, Cass. She kept the boots and walked out the door of her apartment, down the stairs to where her Uber was waiting.

  Galen’s apartment building was a dream. Cassidy hadn’t even been inside yet, and she was already impressed. Still, maybe that’s what you got when you were a surgeon. She inhaled for a count of four and blew her breath out in a strong gust, lifting her chest and walking into the building. The elevator stopped at the 19th floor, and she got off, searching the doors for the apartment number Pierce had given her.

  One more deep breath, and Cassidy knocked confidently. The shuffle of feet and friendly voices radiated out, and then the door opened. Pierce stood in the entry way, wearing a pair of tight black jeans faded in all the right places and a leather moto jacket over a button-down shirt that fell open to show the subtle muscles of her chest and shoulders. Cassidy felt her mouth drop a little, and a faint warmth grew between her legs. What was wrong with her? She hadn’t even slept with Pierce, and she already wanted her more than she thought was entirely reasonable.

  “Welcome,” Pierce said, smiling. Did Pierce have any idea what kind of absurd response her body was having? She should have let Pierce think she was straight.

  “Thank you.” She mentally pulled herself together and stepped into the apartment. “I brought some wine.” She handed the bottle to Pierce.

  “Very thoughtful. You look great, by the way.” Pierce’s cheeks pinked, and the warmth between Cassidy’s legs returned stronger than ever.

  “So do you.” As Cassidy willed herself to keep her voice even and strong, a stunning woman in
a baby-blue dress came from around the corner.

  “You must be Cassidy!” The woman, who Cassidy had to assume was Galen’s partner, hugged her. “Sorry. I’m from the South. We’re huggers.”

  “That’s okay. So am I.” Cassidy laughed.

  “I’m Rowan. I’m so glad you could make it over tonight.”

  Rowan was warm and kind, and Cassidy liked her instantly. “Thank you for inviting me.”

  “I think it was all these two,” Rowan said, gesturing to Galen and Pierce, who stood side by side, leaning against the dining-room table, simultaneously sipping from glasses of bourbon on the rocks.

  “The resemblance is eerie, isn’t it?” Cassidy asked.

  “Almost creepy.” Rowan nodded. They laughed, and Cassidy felt more at home than she had since she moved to Boston.

  Cassidy sat across from Pierce at dinner, and as the meal continued on and the wine flowed, she found it more and more difficult not to stare at her. It was that damn mouth again. So full, and warm, and inviting, just begging for Cassidy to kiss it. God, it had been so long since she’d kissed anyone. In fact, the last kiss she could even remember was when her senior resident forcefully bumped his mouth against hers on a work retreat. Cassidy had managed to slap him hard enough that she actually knocked the drool out of his mouth. They hadn’t spoken since.

  “So, Cassidy, do you have any family or anyone around the area? Parents? Siblings? Girlfriend?” Galen flicked her eyebrows at everyone around the table.

  “Nice, baby. Very subtle,” Rowan said, reaching over and squeezing Galen’s hand. Cassidy laughed uncomfortably and once again found herself looking at Pierce, whose eyes were glassy. She wasn’t sure if it was the whiskey or the topic at hand.

  “Not really, no. My family is all over the place. Dad in Wisconsin and Mom in Delaware. I have a brother in Vermont, but that’s about it.” A brief chill ran down Cassidy’s neck at the thought of her parents. It had been almost a decade since the divorce, which she still so shamefully blamed herself for. Nearly losing a child is a lot to put on a marriage. But she pushed the thoughts aside, as she always did when it came to those horrid years in the hospital. Everything was fine now. She was fine.